Journey of Illumination
by Lady Lark
Summary: As graduation looms, Akari is uncertain about what she wants to do with her life. When the new school year begins, she finds new challenges and friends and a new purpose. Winner Japanese Culture in MM.O's Max Challenge contest.
1. The Germs of an Idea

_Disclaimer: Hikaru no Go was created by Hotta and Obata. All characters and plots belong to them, including any I create. This is a piece of fanfiction written by fans for the enjoyment of other fans. No money was made by the creation of this work._

**Journey of Illumination**

_**By Lady Lark**_

**Chapter 1 – The Germs of an Idea**

March 23, 2002

Graduation is a bittersweet time of year, she mused watching the members of the Haze Junior High Go Club mingle through the crush of people. It was a time of jubilation and accomplishment but paradoxically a time of tearful good-byes and wistful regret. It was fitting that it fell during the spring when the air was full of cherry blossoms which were both so lovely and so ephemeral. She never wanted it to end but at the same time she couldn't wait to start the next phase of her life.

She walked away from the crowds and onto a path meandering through the landscaped grounds. She wanted a little time alone to think and to remember. In two weeks, she would be starting high school. For right now, though, she wanted to savor each memory.

A sharp gust of wind blew through the campus, leading the pale pink petals in a complicated dance. Fujisaki Akari wrapped her arms around herself and breathed in the crisp spring air, trying not to dwell on the person missing from this momentous occasion: her oldest friend Shindou Hikaru. As a professional Go player, Hikaru's schedule often forced him to miss classes and other school sponsored activities. She wasn't surprised that he was unable to make the ceremony. Still, she had hoped he would come, if only to say good-bye.

Closing her eyes to try to stop the welling of tears, she forced herself to think of happier thoughts – Tsutsui and Hikaru teaching her to play Go, Mitani returning to the club after his self-imposed exile, winning her game as second chair in the winter tournament. She smiled ruefully as she realized that all of her happy memories centered around Go. Even the majority of her friends had some involvement with the game.

"Oi, Akari!"

She jumped, startled. Lost in her reverie, she had missed hearing the telltale footsteps that heralded his approach.

"Hikaru! It's good to see you!"

She glanced over him, taking in his appearance and the easy confidence with which he carried himself, smiling at his bleached bangs. His trademark look brought back memories.

When he had first colored them in fifth grade, he had missed so many spots that he looked like a demented zebra with streaks of blonde and black. The kids at school had laughed at him mockingly calling him names. In tears, he had asked for her help at fixing the mess. She had agreed without hesitation and the gratitude shining on his face was all the thanks she needed. While applying the gritty blue substance, she suggested that in the future he have someone else dye his hair for him to avoid the same thing happening next time. He had looked at her smiling face in confusion searching it. When he reached her lips, he answered smile with one of his own and nodded. For two years, she had touched up his roots until he had left to become an insei. She guessed he had found someone else to do it for him or he started doing it himself. Still it was a memory that she treasured.

She snapped out of her daydream to find Hikaru staring at her with concern.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to space out like that. It's just . . . I didn't think you would make it."

He shrugged accepting her excuse. "I almost didn't." He paused giving her an inquisitive glance. "Whatcha doin' over here all by yourself? I thought I'd find you with the rest of the club."

"I wanted some time to myself to think and take stock. Do you realize that after this year all of us will be going our separate ways?"

"I hadn't really thought about it like that," he said, scratching the back of his head.

"It's true, though. You're not going to high school . . ."

"There's no need to. I'm doin' what I want already. Goin' to school seems kinda stupid."

She nodded. "I know. You're lucky. Me, I don't know what I want to do, the only thing I really love is the Go Club."

"But you suck," he said thoughtlessly. She winced but didn't argue she knew her skills at the game didn't even come close to matching his. "What high school are you goin' to?" he continued.

"Mitaka. Mitani-kun and Kaneko-chan are going there as well."

"Do they have a Go Club?"

"I think so, but if they don't it really doesn't matter since I helped started one before. I can do it again and this time I have two players already."

"Sounds like Tsutsui-san rubbed off on you."

She nodded. "He taught me so much."

"Yeah." The two friends lapsed into an awkward silence. "Maybe, if it doesn't interfere with my schedule, I could stop by and see how you are doing. Maybe give you a few pointers."

"I'd like that," she said, giving him a soft smile. She was happy that he still wanted to be a part of her life, if only in this small way.

"So . . . how do you plan to start up?"

"The same way Tsutsui-san did, I guess, with posters and maybe a booth at the school festival. Mitani-kun said he'll help with spreading the word. Which has me worried a little, but he means well." Hikaru laughed at her assessment of the other player. "Kaneko-chan can't do that much since she is going to be trying out for the volleyball team. But she says that she will come to meetings when she has the time. It'll work out. I know it will!"

"I hope you get lots of members."

"Me too."

"Are there any tournaments?"

"Of course there are, silly! It's just like junior high with four main tournaments a year. There is even Kaio to go up against since they have a high school that's fed by the Junior High we know. I even hear that their head coach is a professional," she said, a bit wistfully.

"Wow, they really are serious about Go. But that isn't a surprise. Their junior high coach is an Korean ex-professional."

"I didn't know that. It explains why they were so good. I know we don't have a chance of beating them. But I would like the chance to face them again, even if I won't be wearing the same uniform."

Hikaru grinned at her, before glancing at the clock tower. "I have to run. I've got a study session in a half an hour. But it was good seeing you."

"I'm glad you could make it."

"I am too. See ya!"

"Bye-bye!" she said with a small wave.

Akari watched him walk away sadly. She knew that she no longer had place in his life anymore. He was one of the rising stars in the professional Go world, while she was a typical student. But she couldn't stop herself from wondering what might have been.

She crouched down, balancing on her heels, and stared up at the clouds overhead. She supposed she should get back to the rest of the group, but she wanted to organize her thoughts a little more. In a way, she wished that she could focus on a career like Hikaru had, but she knew she didn't have the innate talent he did. Which meant that she had to either go to high school or enter a trade, and the latter was not an option her parents would even think of considering.

Akari hadn't told anyone other than her parents that she had tried to get into Kaio on one of their scholarship programs and had failed. Her exam scores were not quite high enough to qualify for the scholarship she needed, although she scored well enough to pass the general admission requirements. After talking it over with her family, she had decided that the tuition was just too much for her family to afford to pay even if she got a part-time job to help offset the costs. In the end, she'd chosen to go to Mitaka because it was closer to her home and the tuition fees weren't too expensive for the level of education she would get.

Deciding to rejoin the rest of the Go club, she rose to her feet. Retracing her steps, she made her way back to the central courtyard.

Natsume, a tall lanky boy, noticed her return and lightly nudged Mitani who was standing next to him. The red-head lifted his head and his eyes met hers. In them was a hint of worry tinged with some other emotion she couldn't identify. She waved slightly at him and the concern faded from his gaze, but the other emotion remained.

She walked up to where the Go club was clustered. "Hi guys!" she called brightly to the group. One by one, the club greeted her in return.

"Akari-chan, I missed you! We've been wondering where you went off to," Kumiko said softly.

"Fujisaki-san! You should've come earlier. You missed seeing Shindou-san!

She shook her head. "Nnn. Koike-kun, I saw Hikaru. We got the opportunity to talk a little right before he had to leave."

"Oh, I'm glad Akari-chan. You would have been upset if you missed seeing him."

Akari nodded in agreement, unwilling to elaborate any further. Kumiko knew that she had had a crush on Hikaru since the fourth grade and only recently had started to get over it. It was one thing for her best girlfriend to know her feelings, it was another for the rest of the club to know them. It was too embarrassing to think about.

Casting about for another subject she asked, "Did anything else happen while I was gone?"

"Nope, it was pretty boring. A couple of students wished us good luck, but that was about it."

"We also talked about the fate of the Go Club here. Koike's going to have his work cut out for him," Kuniko interjected.

"See what you miss when you aren't here? You shouldn't run off like that, Akari-san. It makes Mitani nervous. Doesn't it Mitani?" Kaneko teased.

He glared at the other girl angrily. "It does not! I was just worried that some freak was bothering her. She' too nice for her own good and someone might take advantage of that."

"I can take care of myself, Mitani-kun. There's no need to worry."

"Still, I don't like that you didn't tell someone where you were going."

"I'm sorry. I didn't think anyone would notice. I just went off to have time to think and take in memories. I'm going to miss this school!"

"Hey, that sounds like a good idea. Visit all of your favorite places and fix them in your mind so you don't forget them. I think I should do that, if you don't mind?" Natsume piped up.

"Go ahead, Natsume-kun," Akari said, not bothering to correct him.

"Can I go with you? I know I'm not graduating but I think I would like to do that too," Koike asked, his adam's apple bobbing up and down vigorously. "I'm going to miss you guys next year."

"You're more than welcome to join me, anyone else want to come?"

"I'd like to stay here with Akari-chan," Kuniko replied.

"I'm with Tsuda-chan," Kaneko said with a flick of the wrist to indicate Kuniko.

"What about you, Mitani?"

The red-head looked torn for a moment and tried to catch Akari's gaze. When their eyes locked, he seemed to be asking her permission to join them. She wondered why he needed her okay, but she smiled gently at him signal that she didn't mind.

Mitani nodded and then turned to Natsume. "Sure, why not? But don't run off without me, Akari."

"I won't."

"Good. Well, let's go." The boys walked off toward the chemistry lab leaving the three girls alone.

"Let's go sit down someplace out of the way of the crowd," Kuniko suggested.

"That sounds like a good idea."

They walked over to one side of the grounds and sat down under a gingko tree.

"I wish we could sit under one of the cherry trees, but it looks like all of the spots are taken."

"Don't trouble yourself over it, here is fine. And it is more private, which is a good thing."

Akari looked at the two sharply.

"You're right, Tsuda-chan, this place is more private."

"Ano . . . " Akari started.

Kaneko silenced her with a stern glance. "Why did you run off on your own earlier? And don't try to evade answering with that excuse about gathering or organizing memories. It won't work."

"Mou. Kaneko, that was very rude." Akari sighed in relief when she heard Kuniko's words. But her heart sank a moment later as the quiet girl continued. "It's amazing. How did you learn to be so blunt?"

"From watching American television, my favorite show is about a woman warrior in ancient Greece. Xena is my idol."

Kuniko clapped her hands in appreciation. "That's very interesting. I'll have to try it sometime. But she's right, Akari. We're worried about you and I think there was more to your statement than just building memories."

Akari shook her head, indicating that she really didn't want talk about it.

"Fujisaki, we're your friends. We want to help you."

Sighing in defeat, she looked at the two earnest faces and decided to share some of her concerns with them. "I'm just not sure about what I want to do with myself. I only have three years of high school and then what? College? A career? Marriage? I don't know what I want in my life."

"That's very normal," said Kaneko, with Kumiko nodding in agreement.

"I know it's normal. But there are times I am so envious of Hikaru I don't know what to do." Kuniko reached over to clasp Akari's hands urging her to continue. "He was just like me, except worse. He was a mediocre student. Not terribly popular. The only thing he excelled at was sports and video games, and even then he wasn't so great that he stood out. Then, out of nowhere, he discovers Go and it consumes him, becoming his driving goal. And suddenly, I'm the one getting left behind. We'd always done things together; that's why I joined the Go club in the first place."

"Really? I mean, I'd guessed but I wasn't sure."

"I liked the game a lot. Although I didn't really know anything about it." She stopped, a chuckle coming to her lips. At Kaneko and a Kuniko's curious looks she elaborated. "The first time Hikaru tried to show me how to play, I confused Go with Othello and tried to move a stone to avoid it getting captured. Hikaru was so frustrated with me!" she laughed.

The other two girls giggled and then joined her in laughter.

"Oh my, I can just imagine Shindou-kun's face."

"I'm glad that I didn't have him for a teacher."

"No, no. He was a good teacher, really. He just didn't have any patience with how slow I was. He taught me a lot though. I just didn't have the same drive he did."

Kaneko sobered. "You're wrong, Akari."

"Kaneko-chan!"

"Tsuda-chan, hush. You may not have the same skill or talent that Shindou has, but you do have the drive. You were the one who held the Go club together after Hikaru left, Mitani quit, and Tsutsui graduated. You were the one who managed to persuade Mitani to rejoin the club so that we could participate in the tournament. You are the one who kept the _kifu_, who made sure we were able to register. You say you aren't any good, Fujisaki. I say you are wrong. I've been playing Go since I was a child, years longer than you have, and you are not that much weaker than I."

"But . . ."

"No buts. You've improved a lot in the past three years."

"Shirakawa-sensei says so, but I thought that he was just encouraging me."

"So you admit you have the drive to succeed."

"I guess, I do. But at what?"

"Well what do you love to do? What do you want to do?"

Akari thought about this, trying to find something other than the first thing which had popped into her head. After several moments, she gave up the search and decided to reveal her heart's desire. "I love Go. At first, it was something to keep me closer to Hikaru. But then I began to love it for itself. I would like to do something with the game. But the only thing I can think of is becoming a professional player, and I'm not good enough for that."

"Don't jump to conclusions. I told you that you have improved a lot in the past few years and you have. You are our second board, and I bet if you really applied yourself, you could be first board instead of me."

"I could never do that!"

"Yes, you can, Akari-chan!" Kuniko chimed in. "You don't need a handicap against Kaneko anymore and you don't lose by as many _moku_ either. Even I can see that."

"She's right. I haven't improved much, but you've gotten a lot better. I bet if you got an actual teacher, rather than just attending a class you would do a lot better. Maybe even good enough to become an insei or even a pro. But you won't know until you try," Kaneko added, dryly. "Come on, Tsuda-chan, let's leave her to ponder the import of our words."

"Kaneko-chan, you are so silly! But you're right –"

Kaneko interrupted. "Of course, I am –"

"We should get going," Kuniko cut the other girl off with a sharp tug on her arm. "We'll see you later."

Akari looked up at them. "You've given me a lot to think about. Thanks."

"You're welcome," Kaneko responded. "Come on, Tsuda-chan. Let's go find the guys."

"Bye!"

Kaneko and Kuniko left Akari under the gingko tree to think about what they had said. She hadn't really thought about how much she had improved always comparing herself to Hikaru and his skill. Additionally, she had taken Hikaru's assessment of her skills at face value without considering the source.

Shirakawa-sensei had complimented her on her improvement. Even more telling, was that he had placed her against stronger and stronger students in the class until she was playing some of the better players. She wasn't winning all the time, but she was improving.

Deciding that she needed to talk to Shirakawa-sensei and find out about improving even more, she rose to her feet brushing off the accumulated dust and grass, determined to make to the afternoon class. She took a few moments to orient herself, before setting off at a brisk pace.

She made it to the entrance of the school without being stopped by her classmates, when an accusatory voice stopped her.

"I thought I asked you to wait for me."

"Mitani-kun, you startled me!" Akari exclaimed, holding one hand to her chest to try to calm her rapid heartbeat.

"Sorry," he mumbled sullenly. "So where are you going?"

"Go Class, I wanted to try to make the afternoon session."

"Oh."

"Yeah," she muttered. She was embarrassed that she forgot Mitani's request. She didn't mean to forget. She glanced at him and saw hurt reflected in his eyes. "Look, I'm sorry." She looked back down at her feet.

Reaching his hand out, Mitani touched her wrist. She raised her head so she could see his expression.

"It's okay. I figured you'd forget. That's why was waiting," he soothed. "I don't want to keep you long, but I want to ask you something," he said slowly, twisting his fingers together.

"Go ahead," she said gently.

"What high school are you going to?"

She heaved a mental sigh of relief that he hadn't asked her to be his girlfriend. She was not ready to answer that question. "Mitaka, the same one you're going to."

A huge grin made its way onto Mitani's face. "You are?"

"Um-hmm, I am."

"Why?"

"Because it has a Go Club already, it is close to my house, and the tuition isn't too expensive."

"Oh . . . " he said a bit dejectedly.

"Why did you go there, Mitani-kun?"

He thought about it for a second. "I decided to go there because theirs was the only entrance exam I was able to pass. And I only passed it 'cause Kaneko was helping me with their practice exam. I'm not that good of a student. But if I can go to high school I will."

"Oh. I guess getting Kaneko's help was a good thing."

"You mentioned that they have a Go team; do you know if they are any good?"

"I have no idea," she said with a laugh. "It didn't matter to me since I know that I will be playing strong people and getting better all the time."

"You sound like Shindou, always wanting to play strong players."

"It's the only way I can get better. Don't worry though, Mitani-kun is still much stronger than me!"

"I wonder. . . "

"Hmmm . . ."

"Akari-san, would you like to play a game?"

"What?" she asked in surprise.

"I would be honored to challenge you to an even game of Go."

"Mitani-kun . . . "

"What? Was that too formal?" he asked with a little frown.

"You want to challenge me to game? Why?"

"I haven't played you much recently. Instead, I've been concentrating on helping Natsume and Koike."

"Don't forget Kaneko."

"Ugh, how can I? She's constantly challenging me saying she when she beats me that I will have to take her for ice cream or pizza."

Akari winced at the harshness of his words. It was an open secret of the Go club that Kaneko had a crush on Mitani. Akari wasn't sure that Mitani knew that Kaneko was trying to get him to date her, since most of the time he seemed oblivious to her remarks.

"So you want to challenge me because we haven't played in a long time?"

He nodded slowly.

She thought about it. She really wanted to ask Shirakawa-sensei about how much she had improved. However, playing Mitani might give her the same answers. When she first started playing against Mitani, he had to give her a six-stone handicap. After a few months, she had graduated to a five stone handicap against him. But then he had quit along with Hikaru, and when he had returned he had immediately concentrated on improving the boys' team. She hadn't really played him in almost a year, she realized with a start.

She glanced at the clock-tower and made up her decision. "I'd be happy to play a game with you."

"What about your class?"

She didn't want him to feel guilty about keeping her, but at the same time she didn't want to lie. "There is one tomorrow. I'd rather spend my time with a good friend who is kind enough to challenge me to an equal game despite my unworthiness of such an offer."

"Ano, who are you? And what did you do with my Akari-san?"

Her eyes widened at the possessive pronoun, but she decided to ignore it. "I didn't do anything, Mitani-kun. I thought if you could talk to me so formally, that I could do the same. Was I wrong to think that?"

"No, no. I just didn't expect you to react like that. You sounded like a lady out of a samurai movie."

"Oh. Well, I was one of the top ten students in Japanese class. I've never had a chance to use the old formal language in a real life situation. It requires a shift in thinking. Where'd you want to go play?"

"How about the science lab?"

She shook her head. "The room is locked today because of graduation so that little kids couldn't get into things if they ran off. Sensei told me that, in case I needed to get anything out of the room before graduation."

"Oh. So that's why we couldn't get in earlier."

She nodded. "I don't have a go board at home either."

"Neither do I," he admitted ruefully, rubbing the back of his head.

She racked her brain for a moment. "So, where does that leave us?"

"We could go to a Go salon."

"Okay, let's do that!"

Mitani winced. "I haven't been to a salon in a long time."

"We don't have to go to that one," she said softly, understanding his reluctance. He'd been caught cheating at Go and had been disciplined by a professional who had been called in by the owner of the salon he frequented. Since that time, Mitani hadn't set foot in a salon as far as she knew.

"You know about that?" he asked in a startled tone.

"Of course I do, I was there remember. And Hikaru told me the rest. He really wanted you for the team."

"He wanted a cheater like me. . . " Mitani trailed off and turned away from her.

"You aren't one now," she soothed. "You haven't been one in years. It was just a phase you went through. You respect the game too much now to dishonor it again."

"You sound like Tsutsui," he accused, whipping around to face her. She could see his eyes were bright with unshed tears.

"Hikaru said the same thing earlier. I take that as a compliment. He was a great sempai and a good friend. He taught me a lot."

Mitani pressed his lips into a thin line as he thought about her statement. She knew that he had butted heads with the studious founder of the Haze Go Club over several aspects of the game. Akari crossed her fingers, hoping he wouldn't decide to storm off. But the red-head just stood there, clenching and unclenching his fists. "Yeah, he did," he admitted after a tense moment. He looked around the area outside the school. "Do you know where a go salon is around here?"

"No, I've never been in one before."

"How do you handle cigarette smoke?"

She gave him a confused look at the seeming non-sequitur, but decided to answer his question honestly. "My father smokes, my mother hates it, though, so she makes him smoke outside."

He shook his head. "That's not what I meant. A lot of these places have a perpetual fog of cigarette smoke in them."

"Oh. I think I can handle it," she said confidently.

"Try to breathe through your mouth if possible. It helps."

She nodded. "Okay. So where are we going?"

"I only know of one near here."

"Well, let's go!"

He gave her a stricken look. "I'd rather go someplace else. I have bad memories of that salon."

"Oh, you mean it's the place where --"

"Yeah, it is," he snapped, cutting her off.

"Do you know of any other places?" she asked, backpedaling,

He shook his head. "I do. But they aren't places I would take a girl." He sighed in resignation. "I guess, I really don't have a choice. It's my old salon or nothing."

"We can wait until tomorrow. I can ask my sensei if he knows of any places."

He shook his head. "No. I need to do this now."

She gave him a sharp look and said slowly, "Okay."

He pointed toward the train station. "It's just one stop down."

They walked in silence for which Akari was deeply grateful. She wasn't sure what to make of Mitani's actions. He was acting very strangely. First with the worry, and then with referring to her as 'his Akari.' It was too weird.

She didn't know why it was so important that he play her in an even game now. But if she was going to become a pro, she knew that she was going to have to beat Mitani. She was not looking forward to that day.

She stopped walking at the realization. Without really thinking it through, she had made a decision about what she wanted to do with her life. She was going to try to become a professional player. Akari grinned. The decision was easier to make than she had originally believed. With that thought in her head, she jogged to catch up to Mitani who was waiting for her.

She gave him a small smile, but didn't speak. She didn't trust herself not to reveal her thoughts. Based on Mitani's reaction when Hikaru said he wanted to be a professional player, she didn't think it would be a good idea. She knew that she would have to tell him sometime, just not right now.

After boarding the train, they found a place to stand next to the doors since they didn't have far to travel on the loop. She looked around the car and wasn't surprised to see a lot of kids her own age. Graduation was a universal occurrence in Japan, with the new school year starting up at the same time prefecture wide. She wondered how many of the students were trying to stay in touch with the friends they made in junior high for just a little bit longer.

She was going to miss seeing Kumiko, Natsume, and Hikaru every day since they had decided to go separate ways. Kumiko was attending an all girls' school at her parents' insistence. Natsume had elected not to go to high school, like Hikaru. Instead, his parents had obtained an apprenticeship under a well-regarded sushi chef for him. She was happy for Natsume since he had always dreamed of becoming a chef, but didn't feel comfortable in the all girl home-ec club. Now, he could pursue his dream. She felt sorry for Kumiko, though, since the shy girl had a hard time talking to boys as it was. Akari hoped that Kumiko managed to make some good friends who wouldn't let her slip behind her shell.

The pleasant male voice announced that the station was approaching, and her hand gripped the pole a little tighter. The train slowed then jerked to a stop. When the doors opened, Mitani grabbed her wrist so as not to lose her in the mass of people entering and exiting the train. They crossed the platform, and he dropped her hand.

"We go that way," he said, pointing toward one of the subway exits. "It's not too far."

"Okay."

Once again, they walked in silence for a bit. However, Akari was worried about Mitani. While he wasn't a talkative boy in general, it was rare for him to be this quiet.

"Are you okay, Mitani-kun?"

"Huh? Um, yeah," he answered, seemingly distracted by something. "We make a right here."

She frowned at his brush off, but decided not to pry any further. He was obviously lost in his thoughts. She suspected that it had to do with his upcoming confrontation with the Go Salon owner.

He paused beside a ramen restaurant and breathed deeply for a few moments. "It's just ahead, down those stairs."

She looked at the dark entrance and had a small sense of foreboding. She didn't like dark places ever since she was a small child. After her experience in Hikaru's grandfather's shed, where Hikaru had claimed to see a phantom blood stain and heard disembodied voices, her fear of ghosts and demons had intensified.

She clutched her arms closer to her body. "Are you sure you want to do this?" she asked tremulously, eyeing the opening suspiciously.

He looked at her sharply, taking in her frightened features and jumping to the wrong conclusion. "It'll be okay. Doc'll make sure that you are left alone."

"Doc?"

"The guy who runs the counter."

"Oh."

"Come on," he said starting down the steps.

Unwilling to be left behind, she followed him closely. She kept casting her eyes about willing the shadows to remain shadows. Mitani reached the bottom and opened the door. Anxious to get out of the stairwell, she darted into room. Then stopped as a wave of stale cigarette smoke assaulted her.

"Breathe through your mouth until you get used to the smell," he reminded her.

She nodded at him gratefully and started inhaling and exhaling through her mouth.

"_Irasshai_!" the old man at the counter greeted. "Oi! Mitani-kun, I haven't seen you in a while."

"Whatever, Doc. Do you have an open board?"

"What? You aren't going to challenge the customers?"

"No, I want to play a friend and since neither of us have boards at home; we came here."

"My, my. You've changed, boy. I'm glad."

Mitani shrugged. "How much?"

"Five hundred yen for each of you," Doc replied.

Handing him a 1000 yen bill, Mitani said, "We'll take the table right here by the door. My friend isn't used to the cigarette smoke so we will take all of the fresh air that we can."

Doc laughed. "Go ahead," he said, before turning on the television behind the counter.

"Come on Akari, let's play."

"You didn't have to pay for me, Mitani-kun. I have money," she protested.

"Yeah, but I'm the one that challenged you. Consider it my treat."

She gave him a piercing look, which he returned blandly. "If you insist."

"I do."

"Thanks," she said pulling a chair out from the long table and sitting down at it. She scooted forward and reached for the go _ke_ in front of her. She opened the lid and noticed it was black. "You _nigiri_."

He nodded and opened the one before him and reached in and pulled out a handful of white stones. She placed black stone in front of her signaling that she thought the number of white stones would be odd.

"Two . . . four . . . six . . . seven. It's odd. You're black."

She smiled and placed the ke next to the board with the lid ready to hold captured stones. When she noticed that he was ready, she nodded at him.

As one, they both leaned forward and bowed. "_Onegaishimasu_," they said in unison.

They looked up at each other and smiled.

She slipped her hand into the _ke_, reveling in the slippery feel of shale under her fingers. Selecting a piece, she positioned it between her index and middle fingers. She thought about her opening move for a little bit and placed the stone on the 5-5 corner star.

Mitani smiled and placed his stone on the opposite star.

The game had begun!

For several moments the only sound heard was the clack of go stones against the go board and the low drone of Doc's television.

Then, Akari let a small groan. "Mou! I was hoping you wouldn't do that," she said referring to the upper left corner where he had cut off several of her stones.

"They aren't dead yet, there are still a few ways you can save them."

She looked at the _goban_, studying the arrangement of stones. The lower right corner was hers, while the upper right corner Mitani won early on. Currently, he was ahead of her by fifteen and a half _moku_ counting _komi_. While the lower left corner was still unclaimed, if she didn't manage to save the upper left, she didn't have a chance at winning. As her eyes followed the placement of the stones, a path began to emerge. Mitani was right; she could save those stones.

Grabbing a stone out of the _ke_, she placed it on the board. She lifted her eyes to meet eyes and noted the look of approval in them. She had chosen the correct path.

He countered, placing an obstacle in her way. But that didn't deter her. She knew she could salvage the corner. She may not win the game, but this battle was hers. Carefully setting each stone so as retain a liberty, she slowly, inexorably, extended her wall to save the stones.

Several moves later, Mitani looked up from the board with a smile. "You did well there. You could have made a few eyes and saved them that way, but this way you earned more territory."

"Thank you," she acknowledged. "I wasn't sure I was going to make it."

"But you did. Well done."

The two lapsed back into silence for several minutes. Akari tried hard to win the other corner, knowing that to do so would put Mitani in a very bad position, but was unable to do so. The battle continued to the sides and eventually into the middle, where Akari realized that her shape wasn't strong enough to win.

Sighing, she bowed before Mitani. "_Makemashita_."

"Thank you for the game," he intoned.

"Thank you for the game," she returned, completing the ritual. She then started gesturing at various places on the board. "I didn't had a chance. Not after you took the top and the right sides, I knew that it would take a miracle to save me."

Nodding in agreement, he pointed to a spot on the board. "You were too cautious here. That allowed me to take more territory later. You could have easily extended your territory by a few _moku_ without any problem."

"I see that now. But I was afraid you would jump in and try to take over."

He shook his head. "It would have been more trouble than it was worth and I wouldn't have gained anything by doing that. You also got a little desperate here I think." He pointed to the left side of the _goban_.

"I was. I kept counting _moku_ in my head and you kept coming out ten ahead. I needed to do something to counter that."

He moved a few stones and said, "Playing here would have been better. It extended your wall and set your self up nicely for taking over the middle."

"So aside from all of those mistakes, how did I do?"

Mitani regarded her seriously for a long time. "You've gotten better. A lot better. I think that next time that a two or three stone handicap would be challenging for you but still winnable."

"Really?"

"Um-hmm, I think that Kaneko has a rival for her first captain position."

She smiled at his assessment, but deep inside her she knew that her goal was much greater than that. Soon, she decided, she needed to talk with Shirakawa-sensei and find out more about becoming a professional go player.

* * *

AN:

This is my first foray into long, almost epic length, fic. It is also my second Hikaru no Go story. The first was a short little piece that can be found in my profile.

I am writing this as an experiment. To see if I can actually write and finish an epic length story. I started doing this as a part of NaNoWriMo – National Novel Writing Month – I didn't make it but I wrote more than I ever have previously.

I am only a beginner at the game of Go so most of my dialogue for that comes from what I overheard at the Orlando Go Club and what I can glean from various books and websites. I am also looking for some strong constructive criticism here. If you don't like this, tell me why. I want to improve and feedback is the only way to do so.

For those of you looking for pairings, I don't know what to tell you. Right now I do have a pairing in mind. But in general, this is going to be a fic about Akari and her quest. I hope you'll stay with me for that.

If you read my DBZ fanfiction, you will notice that I have a lot of trouble coming up with titles. This fic was no exception. For the longest time, I was calling this "Akari no Go" but I was never happy with that title. As far as I am concerned, the title is still a work in progress like the story. If you have any suggestions I would appreciate it.

I have a few shout outs. One is to my roommate for putting up with my demented typing and occasional outbursts of "What was the name of . . . "

The other is to Lady MacBeth, a fellow NaNoWriMo participant who has been very encouraging of my writing fanfiction for my novel . Thanks to both of you, if you read this. I also want to give a huge thank you to Panasonic Princess, BakaBokken and Lady MacBeth for Betaing this for me. She caught a lot of mistakes and she deserves some great credit. Also thanks go out to Troy Thomas and Broken Visage for some great feedback and the Members of MediaMiner's Fanfiction Review Guild for all of their great con-crit.

A couple of cultural notes:

The Japanese School Year begins in April and ends in March. Schooling is mandatory through grade nine, but anything after that is elective. High Schools in Japan charge tuition unlike here in the U.S. and the prices vary from school to school. And it is not uncommon for students to commute long distances to attend prestigious high schools.

One of my betas asked me to explain what the loop was in the train scene. The loop is referring to the subway lines that run through out Tokyo. There is an inner loop that circles the interior of the city and there is an outer loop that runs along the edge. Then there are lines of trains that run like spokes of a wheel through the loops. The reason why it is called a loop is because each train only goes one way and makes a giant circuit. It is best illustrated in the anime Evangelion in the episode where Shinji runs away and sits on the Train brooding.

Japan is also known for its permissiveness towards smoking. Men chain smoke and they do it indoors. And Go Salons are known for having a thick haze of smoke hanging in them. It is kinda like bars here in the US.

If there is anything that you didn't understand, I'm sorry. Feel free to drop me a line and ask. I'll be happy to explain.

Until next time!


	2. The Urge to Succeed

_Disclaimer: Hikaru no Go was created by Hotta and Obata, I am merely borrowing their characters. No money was made in the creation of this work and no disrespect is intended to the creators and owners. This is a piece of fanwork written by a fan for fans. Please support the real artists, the creators._

**Journey of Illumination**

_**By Lady Lark**_

**Chapter Two – The Urge to Succeed**

April 8, 2002

The cherry blossoms swirled in the morning air as Akari walked up the steps of Mitaka High School. Absentmindedly, she straightened the front of her blazer, distinctly aware of how different it was from the sailor suit Haze Junior High had. Both males and females wore navy blue blazers with the school crest on the lapel. Boys wore navy slacks while the girls had a choice of either a plaid or navy pleated skirt. The high school was also very progressive, being one of the first schools in the prefecture to allow girls to wear slacks instead of skirts. Akari wasn't sure how she felt about this. She preferred skirts herself, but she could see where pants were more practical in the bitterly cold winter months.

After passing through the front entrance, she stepped off to one side to consult her student planner. She wanted to make sure that she went to the right place to change into her school shoes. But when she looked at the map, she didn't see a place to do that. Confused, she followed a group of upperclassmen girls to see where they went and was stunned to find that they headed directly for their homeroom.

Shrugging at the strangeness, she consulted her planner once more. She had been assigned to class 1-B which was on the third floor of the building. Finding the stairs, she headed for the third floor all the while scanning the crowd for a familiar face. Reaching the landing, she was pleased to note that her classroom was only a few feet from the stairs.

How convenient!

Sliding the door open just as the bells in the clock tower began to chime, Akari heaved a sigh of relief. She wasn't late. Seeing that there was an empty seat still open by one of the windows, she crossed to it, settling her book bag on the hooks hanging off of the side of the desk.

She settled herself in the seat and glanced out the window. The view was to the south and she could see both the baseball and soccer fields from her seat. It was the perfect seat for daydreaming and Hikaru would have loved it.

Thinking of her friend made her wistful again. She had read in Weekly Go that he was preparing for the new Japan/China/Korea cup. She wished she could go cheer him on. She wondered about this new player, Yashiro. She hoped that Hikaru had managed to talk to Touya Akira. She remembered Hikaru's rival from the three times she had met him. The first had been when Touya had tracked down Hikaru at the Go club meeting.

Before she had the chance to sink into her memories, the homeroom teacher opened the door. Out of habit, the class rose to their feet and bowed at their sensei's arrival. The middle-aged man beamed at their politeness and walked over to the desk where he set down a stack of books.

"Good morning, class. My name is Tanaka Masao. I will be your homeroom teacher for this school year. Let's all do our best to make it a good one. This is class 1-B, so if you're in the wrong class I suggest you find the correct classroom now."

One girl near the front of the room looked shocked and leapt to her feet, grabbing her book bag with one hand. "I am so sorry. Please forgive my stupidity," she said, bowing deeply.

"It's quite alright, miss. The classrooms are labeled so you should be able to find the correct homeroom easily."

The girl bowed once more and slipped out of the room. After she had left, Akari took the opportunity to scan the room to see if either Kaneko or Mitani was in her homeroom. Neither were she noted.

Tanaka-sensei shuffled the papers on the desk until he found the one he was looking for. "This is the class list. The current class representatives are Himura Yasuo and Kurokawa Sayuri, they will change based on class ranking," he paused. Both stood up when their names had been called – Himura was a slender young man with messy hair whereas Kurokawa was a short, painfully thin girl, with long hair pulled back into a single braid. The teacher nodded at them once and both students sat down.

Tanaka handed the class list to Kurokawa and continued with the typical first day of school business. He posted the weekly class schedule, which she copied disinterestedly. He also listed the various clubs and their after school meeting locations. She perked up at this, and was pleased to hear that the Go and Shogi club had their own room on the fourth floor. She made a note to go check out the club after school.

The first four periods passed quickly with each teacher going over the general outline of the course and handing out a list of assignments. Akari took down each of the assignments in her planner and started to wonder how she would every find the time to do her homework and be a member of a club.

Finally lunch time arrived. She fished around in her bag and pulled out her bento. Then she felt torn. She wanted to stay and socialize, but she also wanted to go look for Mitani and Kaneko. Maybe, if she ate her lunch quickly, she would have time to do both. Turning to the girl sitting next to her she struck up a conversation about junior high and club experiences.

Akari glanced down at her wristwatch and sighed. She only had about twenty minutes left. She gave her neighbor an apologetic glance. "I'm sorry. But I want to go check the other classes to see if I can find a few of my former schoolmates."

The other girl nodded. "That's fine with me. I'm going to try to work on a story for the Journalism club anyway. Make sure you are back on time though. You don't want to miss the introduction to the next class."

"I won't. It was a pleasure meeting you!" she called as she ran out the door. Her first few stops didn't come up with anything. She turned to walk down the hall to the next classroom, when a familiar voice stopped her.

"Oi, Akari. There you are! We've been looking all over for you."

She turned to see Mitani and Kaneko walking together. She giggled and bounced up and down. "Mitani-kun, Kaneko-chan! It's great to see you guys!"

"It's good to see you too, Fujisaki-chan," Kaneko said with a smile creasing her wide face.

"What class are you guys in?"

"We're both in 1-E," Kaneko answered, pointing at Mitani and herself.

"Lucky! I'm in 1-B. I don't know anyone there. Although one girl seems pretty nice," she elaborated. She glanced at her wristwatch and winced; she only had five minutes before the next class started, but she really wanted to stay and catch up with her friends.

Mitani caught her glance. "You can go, Akari-san. Our classroom is right there," he said in a quiet voice.

"Okay, Mitani-kun. Kaneko-chan. I'll see you after school at the go club," she said cheerfully, turning to run back to class.

"I'm not joining the club here." Akari stopped and faced the other girl slowly.

Kaneko looked uncomfortable, her hands fiddling with the buttons on her blazer.

"Why not?"

"I'm one of the class reps."

"That's wonderful!"

"It is," she agreed with a nod. "But it also means that I have a lot more responsibility. I have to be on the festival committee as well as the school planning committee now, and I still want to join the volleyball club."

"You don't have the time," Akari said, a heavy feeling in her heart.

"No, I don't."

Taking in her friend's dejected posture she knew that Kaneko was torn. It was an honor to have scores high enough to qualify as the classroom rep. But she knew that the shy, overweight girl loved the interaction and acceptance that she found playing Go. Akari reached over and gave Kaneko's hand a quick squeeze. "I understand."

"I knew you would, but I still feel bad."

"Don't. This is important to you. And we'll still be friends. Just make sure to tell me when your games are so I can come cheer you on!"

Akari could see the tension flowing out of Kaneko's body and she sighed. Underneath her hard exterior, the girl was really very sensitive.

"You'd better get back to class," Mitani interjected.

She looked at her watch again. "Eeep! I have to run. See you later!" she called taking off at a run.

She skidded to a stop in front of the door, to catch her breath. Sliding the door open, she gawked at the teacher within.

The woman had short, bright red hair and pixie glasses. But the most startling thing about her was the fact that she was obviously not Japanese. Akari stared at the woman who turned to her and gave her a quick wink. Chagrined, Akari sketched a hasty bow and walked to her desk.

Overhead, the clock tower chimed signaling that lunch was now over.

"Hello, class!" the woman said in English. "I am Kay Roberts and I will be your English teacher this year." She repeated her introduction again in Japanese. "Before we get started I thought that it would be good to get to know each other? You can ask me a question, in English, and I will answer your question in either English or Japanese. My choice. Okay, who's first."

All of the boys' hands shot up. She pointed at one. "Honda Tetsuo, Kay-sensei. Do-do –uh – you – havu – a – boyofurendo?" he stuttered out.

"A bit forward, Mr. Honda. The answer is – that is classified information," she answered in English.

The rest of the questions and answers tended to fall into two categories. Personal – which Kay deflected in English. Or general – which she answered in both Japanese and English. Akari was amused by how the teacher forced them to use their English in order to find out what they wanted to know. All too soon, Kay-sensei, she didn't like being called Roberts-sensei, gathered up her things and moved onto the next classroom.

The rest of the day flew by as they finished up with biology and physical education. The class reps drew lots to decide which rows of students would clean up the classroom that week and Akari blew a sigh of relief that her row's week was week two and not week one.

Grabbing her bag, she literally flew up the stairs to the fourth floor. The announcement this morning had said that the room would be labeled, but she wasn't sure how. Starting at the end of the hallway, she walked down the corridor looking up to see if the room was had a sign or some other kind of marker. She got about halfway down the hall when she heard the distinctive sound of go stones being placed on the board.

She opened the door, to find Mitani sitting across from tall lanky boy with deep red hair. The older boy kept opening and closing a fan as he played the younger man. Akari had a niggling feeling in the back of her head as she watched the two, the upperclassman looked familiar.

As if feeling her eyes on him, he looked up to find her staring at him. "Are you here for Shogi, the game of kings, or are you another one of these stupid Go players?"

His words, coupled by his arrogance made something click in her mind. She did know him. "I'm sorry, Kaga-sempai, but I'm here to play Go."

"What's your name?"

"Fujisaki Akari."

"Well, stow your bag and pull up a chair. I'll play you next," he said placing a stone on the board disdainfully. "It won't take me long to beat this loser here."

Akari winced and watched Mitani bristle under Kaga's derision. The younger boy's hands clenching and unclenching the material of his slacks in anger and frustration

"Don't count me out, sempai. I still have a few tricks up my sleeves."

"Oh yeah? Well you had better pull them out, because in six moves you will have lost both of the top corners and side."

Akari glanced at the board, trying to see the vulnerability that Kaga mentioned. Kaga was playing white and Mitani was playing black, she noted absently. She couldn't see anything other than a few stones that appeared dead. Setting her bag down under the table, she positioned one of the free chairs so that she could watch the game.

One stone laid by Kaga began to extend his territory to threaten the upper right corner. Mitani noted the threat and strengthened his wall along that side. The second stone woke up the sleeping soldiers in Mitani's territory, making them a threat again. The young man groaned and closed yet another chink in his wall.

Kaga chuckled and laid his third stone, this one placing a cluster of three stones into atari. Akari's eyes widened and she could see what Kaga had been referring to earlier. Mitani's position was vulnerable because he didn't take the time earlier to eliminate one of Kaga's stones sitting outside of his wall, which appeared to be unconnected to any other stones. That one stone made it possible for Kaga to take the three stones which were the key to Mitani's control of the top part of the board.

Akari now tried to put herself into Mitani's shoes and see if there was a way to salvage any of his territory. She immediately decided that there was no way that she could save the three stones. The only opening led her right into a ladder situation, and that was something that needed to be avoided at all costs. Kaga was going to take those stones; he didn't need to be given any more. The only solution she could see was to focus on each corner separately, making an eye and closing one wall. That way she could save the corners even if it meant sacrificing the side.

She looked at Mitani to see that his brow was furrowed in deep concentration. Slowly, he fished out a stone and held it between his fingers. He glanced at the stones in atari but instead played just beneath them, placing one of the white stones into atari.

Snapping shut his fan Kaga surrounded the black stones and took his prisoners. Mitani sighed and placed a stone, but the damage was done. The center was opened and his corners were once again vulnerable.

Five moves later and Mitani conceded, knowing that he no longer had enough territory to make a win possible.

"You haven't gotten any stronger since the last time I saw you play."

"What?"

"Against Shindou in the three-way game that I forced him to play to determine if he was ready to be an insei. You haven't gotten any better at Go since then."

"How can you say that? I've been playing for two years since then."

Kaga just shrugged. "It's not my fault that you haven't learned anything since then."

Mitani glared at him, his mouth opening and closing as the boy tried to find something to say. "I don't need this!" he declared finally, grabbing his bag from the back of his chair. "And I don't need this Go Club!"

"That's fine with me! We don't need players who don't have the wit to become better after two years," Kaga retorted, then to insult Mitani further he added, "Shogi is by far the better game, anyway."

The slam of the door sliding shut was Mitani's response.

Akari was torn. Half of her wanted to chase after her friend and encourage him to come back, the other half wanted to stay and give Kaga a piece of her mind.

"Don't worry about him, he'll be back."

"What?" she asked, startled.

"You are planning on going after him aren't you?"

"I was considering it."

"You don't need to. If he is any kind of Go player, he'll be back to challenge me. He won't let that sort of insult go and the only way for him to get satisfaction is to beat me."

Akari shook her head. "I don't know. Mitani-kun is very volatile, he stopped playing Go after Hikaru left and it took me a long time to get him to start playing again."

Kaga looked at her assessingly. "I thought you looked familiar. You were that girl who followed Shindou around all the time. So you play now. How good are you?"

"Not very. Mitani is a better player than I am. You wouldn't get much of a challenge out of me."

"Maybe not at an equal game. But you are still going to play me. All new players have to play me to get ranked. That way we know who is the strongest. The rest of the team trusts my judgment."

Akari nodded. It seemed like a fair system. "All right, I'll play you." She looked at the board again, trying to determine Kaga's strength. "I think maybe a five or six stone handicap would be good," she concluded.

"Why do you say that?"

"Ummm, well, against Mitani-kun I normally have a three-stone handicap. And you seem a bit better than him. You're able to read deeper and respond better to threats. But you're arrogant, and that is a weakness." She motioned to a cluster of stones. "If Mitani-kun had played here, instead of trying to stop you from taking the center, he would have kept all of this corner and made it so that what you got in the center was only a few _moku_. Your entire thrust was based on the assumption that Mitani-kun wouldn't try to protect these stones. If he had played here from the beginning, all you would have gotten were those three stones and nothing else."

Amber eyes narrowed slightly, as he surveyed the board. "You're right. However, I left those stone open so that he could potentially save the corner."

Akari gasped. "You were tutoring him!"

"One of my jobs as captain is to make sure my players improve," he stated pompously.

"Still, Mitani-kun didn't know that!"

"Feh! He's gotten soft. I wasn't baiting him when I said that he hadn't improved. He hasn't, but I am not blaming him entirely."

"Why not."

"Because some of it is your fault."

"What do you mean?"

"Because you aren't a challenge for him. You are all inferior players and you can't get better if the only people you play against don't challenge you, then you have no reason to get better. And as the head of the Go Club, it was your responsibility to make sure he got the challenge he needed."

"Oh. I guess I didn't think about it that way. I haven't been fair to Mitani-kun, have I?"

"No, but it isn't all your fault either. Mitani could have chosen to seek out better players, but he didn't."

"Still . . . "

"Don't blame yourself. Now the way I see it you have three choices. One, you can run out of here and after that loser. Which if you do that, means that you doubt my word and will not be allowed to join the club. Two, you can play me in a game of Go with a six stone handicap. Or three, you can have half a brain and realize that Go is for wusses and that the real game is Shogi. In which case, I would be happy to show you how to play." He paused and looked at her expectantly. "So what is it going to be?"

Giving Kaga a stern look, Akari sat down across from him and started clearing off the stones from the previous game. "I am a Go player. I may not be very good, but I will not turn my back on the game like some people I know."

He laughed at her insult. "You have spunk! Good. Okay, place your stones."

Laying out one stone on each of the top and bottom stars, Akari prepared herself to face Kaga.

"Onegaishimasu," she said with a slight bow.

"Onegaishimasu," he returned and then placed his first stone.

They played for several minutes in silence, Akari concentrating on holding most of the corners and at least two of the sides. They'd had two fierce battles that had cut into her handicap a bit, but in general she was holding her own. The bottom of the board was hers, and she made sure that she didn't fall for the same trick that Mitani had, which had earned her a small nod of approval from Kaga.

"How long have you been playing?" he asked, placing a stone on the board.

"Hmmm . . . are you trying to distract me?"

"Maybe. Is it working?"

She laid a stone which put him into atari. "Not really."

"Good. So answer my question."

"I first learned how to play towards the end of sixth grade, around the same time Hikaru learned I guess." Kaga grunted, encouraging her to continue. "But I really didn't start playing seriously until seventh grade when Tsutsui-san showed me how to really play the game. Before that, I really just watched Hikaru."

"Who were your teachers?"

She thought about it for a second, while studying the board. "Tsutsui-san was my first real teacher. Then there is Shirakawa-sensei who teaches the community Go class. Hikaru taught me a little, when he was around, but most of the time he concentrated on what he wanted to do. Then there was Mitani-kun and Kaneko-chan who tutored me after Tsutsui-san graduated."

"So you haven't had a real teacher."

She bristled under the insult, but she understood his point. Aside from Shirakawa-sensei, all of her teachers had been amateurs. And while the Go Class teacher was a professional, he didn't do one on one tutoring very often. "Everyone has taught me so much, but I want to learn more."

"Good, because you aren't bad."

"Huh? What did you say?" She was certain that she hadn't heard him correctly.

Kaga surveyed the board intently. "You aren't that bad of a player. You aren't good, but like Mitani, you haven't been playing against good players. Which has made it more difficult for you to improve."

"But I'm not as good as Mitani-kun or Kaneko-chan."

"I don't know this Kaneko. But if you got a little tutoring, you would overtake Mitani quickly."

She nodded acknowledging his words, but she didn't say anything. Instead she placed a stone on the board that threatened a cluster of Kaga's stones. She didn't really intend on taking that territory, but she wanted the distraction from her weak left side.

Kaga responded like she hoped and she filled in one hole in her defense. He placed a second stone in response to the threatened cluster. Akari smiled and placed a stone blocking his attempt to connect to one of his walls. Scowling, he placed another stone. Relieved that he didn't attack her weak stones, Akari placed the final stone strengthening her group.

When she looked up, she saw Kaga nodding in approval. "Good play there. If you hadn't threatened me when you did, I would have taken those stones."

"I guessed. I knew I had to do something. My shape was very weak and if I lost it, I was going to have to scramble to hold on to my lead."

"It was a good gambit."

"You knew what I was doing, though, didn't you?"

"Not initially. But your smile earlier gave it away. You need to work on your game face."

She lifted her hands and covered her mouth in embarrassment.

"Don't worry about that now," he advised her. "Worry about this." He placed a stone on the _tengen_, the very center star.

She acknowledged his challenge with one of her own. She was not going to lose this game. Not if she had any say about it!

They moved into the endgame, filling in dame points and filling out walls. All of the battles had already been fought; this was mostly solidification of territory. Although Akari knew from playing Tsutsui, some players excelled at _yose_ and she couldn't let up the fight.

Finally, they both decided that there was no more territory to be gained. Moving the territory into squares, to make it easier to count, they added their prisoners to the other's territory, diminishing the amount of land actually taken.

"I have forty-seven," Kaga announced.

Akari double-checked her count once more, before she looked up at the upperclassman. "I have forty-eight," she said with a grin.

"Good job, Fujisaki. It looks like you gauged your difficulty correctly."

"Thanks, Kaga-sempai."

"Do you realize how difficult that is?"

"Not really. I just watched you play Mitani-kun and saw how much better you were than him. And I know how strong I am against him, so it just clicked."

"Still, that means that you really know your own strength, even against someone you have never played before. That is something that most amateurs take a long time to learn. And you've mastered it."

She blinked. "I hadn't thought about it that way."

"You're not a prodigy like Shindou was, so don't let it go to your head. But you aren't stupid or unwilling to learn, which can mean a lot."

"Thank you, Kaga-sempai. You realize that my main teachers were Mitani-kun and Tsutsui-san."

The older boy thought about it, and then winked at her. "You may be better than you think then. Those two are barely good enough to teach the basics. If you got a decent teacher, well you might actually have some potential. Have you ever considered getting professional training?"

Akari blushed. "I have been thinking about it, but I am still debating the merit of such a step."

"Then you really aren't as stupid as you look."

Ignoring the insult, she blushed even more. "I'm not certain how to go about it. I thought I would talk to my Go Class sensei and ask him."

"That sounds like a good plan."

"Kaga-sempai, would you tutor me as well?" she asked suddenly, gathering her courage.

He looked stunned for a moment, and then laughed in delight. "Me? Be your tutor? No offense, but hell no! Shogi is my game. I gave up Go years ago, I am not going back."

"But you are the captain of this club," she pointed out.

"Because there was no one else willing to do it who had any experience. "

"So you do play, though."

"Only to test out new members."

"What about in tournaments?"

"I only play there if we are short by one player. I prefer Shogi," he said stubbornly.

"I see."

"Speaking of tournaments, there are currently four women on the team, not counting you. If you want to participate, you will have to beat two of them for a place on the team."

"How good are they?" she asked.

"You'll have to play them and find out."

"So you aren't going to give me any hints," she said dryly.

"If you need a hint, think about what I said."

She replayed his words in her mind several times. After the fourth time, she realized something. "You brought up the tournaments to me . . . telling me what I need to do to get on the team. That implies that you think I am good enough to make it on."

"Bingo!"

She bowed at him. "Thank you, Kaga-sempai. I hope I don't let you down."

"I don't think you will, Fujisaki. But you'd better look into that training. I want to play you in an even game before I graduate!"

* * *

AN:

First off, I want to say thank you to my Betas -- The Panasonic Princess, Broken Visage and Troy Thomas. They were very helpful and found lots of mistakes that I missed in the 12 times I read this thing since November. I also want to say thank you to the reviewers of FFARG for their suggestions for chapter 1. Rest assured I will be implementing some of them.

I removed most of the Japanese in this story at a Beta's suggestion, but not all. Some of the words do not translate well or give the same feel, especially not in terms of the Go game. I don't like how "Onegaishimasu" is translated as "Please" so I won't use it. But in general, I am still up in the air.

I apologize right now for any mistakes I made in terms of describing the game of Go. I do not play very much and have only played against amateurs. Although one of them is ranked – I just don't know what. So most of my data and terms are coming from Sensei's Library and Peter Shotwell's Go! More Than a Game book.

I inserted one of my friends into the story, although I changed her name to protect her anonymity. She really is a teacher over in Japan. Although she was initially what she called a live tape recorder – she actually honed her skills enough to be a full time teacher at an elementary school where she teaches English and helps out the Art teacher. I miss her a lot, but I get all sorts of neat info about Japan and their school systems from her. As well as information about what to do and where to go in Tokyo. Don't be surprised if I incorporate some of her stories into this fic.

Mitaka is a real school over in Japan as well. When I first started doing research for this story two years ago, the uniforms were what I described. Just this year, they switched to an open dress code where students can wear what they want so long as it doesn't conflict with their ability to learn. This is extremely progressive. Also if you are interested in looking up more info, Mitaka-cho is also home to the Ghibli Museum.

If you have any cultural questions or anything else feel free to e-mail me, I will be happy to try to answer them.

Thanks For Reading!


	3. Preparations for the Race

_Disclaimer: Hikaru no Go was created by Hotta and Obata, I am merely borrowing their characters. No money was made in the creation of this work and no disrespect is intended to the creators and owners. This is a piece of fanwork written by a fan for fans. Please support the real artists, the creators._

**Journey of Illumination**

_**By Lady Lark**_

**Chapter Three – Preparations for the Race**

April 20, 2002

Akari absently shook off her umbrella as she glared at the sky above. It had been raining for three days straight and she was getting extremely sick of it. Her mother had been lamenting that nothing was getting dry and the pile of dirty clothes and linens only kept growing. Akari sympathized, but she hated the rain for another reason. It made walking to her Go class a miserable experience of wet feet and tangled hair.

Pulling her galoshes off her feet, she gratefully slipped into the visitor slippers provided. She knew she was almost an hour early, but she hoped that she would have the chance to talk to Shirakawa-sensei privately.

She walked upstairs. When she reached the landing, she noticed that one of her elderly neighbors, Ueda-san, was watching a match on the television there. Akari glanced at the screen and noted that the players weren't anyone she had heard of.

She shrugged and briskly walked to the door of the classroom. Opening it, she was pleased to see Shirakawa-sensei up front setting up the diagram board.

"Good afternoon, Sensei!" she called, closing the door behind her.

"Akari-chan, it's good to see you again," he greeted, glancing over his shoulder at her. "You haven't been to class in a long time."

"I'm sorry, Sensei. I didn't mean to miss, but I had entrance exams to take . . . ."

"Ah! Say no more! I remember what those were like. I almost lost my mind because of the stress." He motioned around his head for emphasis. "I couldn't tell if I was wearing the right shoes or not unless someone pointed them out to me. You don't know how many times my principal caught me wearing my slippers home and vice versa."

She smiled, thinking that she hadn't been so stressed out over the entrance exams. Although her mother claimed that she went through several jars of _umeboshi_ in the weeks leading up to taking the exams, but she didn't know what her mother was talking about considering that she had no memory of eating the salt pickled plums.

"I'm glad you understand," Akari said gratefully. "It's been a busy time." She paused, realizing that he had inadvertently given her an opening to ask the questions that she wanted. "Sensei, when did you decide to become a professional Go player?"

Shirakawa paused in his set-up, turning to face her. "Is there any reason why you are asking?" he asked, giving her a sharp look

Biting her lip, she nodded. "I didn't mean to be rude. But lately I've been thinking about the future . . . and what role Go will play in it. I know that I'm not the best player. But I really love the game, and I wanted to know . . . well . . . " she trailed off, uncertain how to proceed. She met his gaze, her eyes pleading with him to understand what she was saying.

"Ah, I see," he said softly. "To answer your question, I decided in high school to pursue a career in Go. However, my sensei didn't make that same decision until he was in college."

She let out the breath that she hadn't realized that she had been holding. "So I don't have to make up my mind now. But I thought that you had to decide to become a pro before you turned eighteen."

"No, you can't become an insei after eighteen. In fact, once you turn eighteen, you can no longer remain an insei. But you can still take the Pro Exam until you are thirty."

"Oh! I didn't know that."

"Akari-chan, do you want to become a professional Go player?" he asked gently.

She glanced at her hands before replying. "I think so."

"Is this because of Shindou-kun?"

She started and looked up at him in surprise. "What? No!"

He chucked at her shock and vehement denial. "I'm glad to hear that. So why are you thinking of becoming a pro?"

"Because Go is the one thing that I enjoy doing and can see myself doing for the rest of my life. I love the game, and want to do something to contribute more to it than just play for fun."

"I am very pleased to hear that Akari-chan. But you know that you are nowhere near good enough yet, right?"

"I know. That's why I wanted to talk to you. I want to find out what I need to do in order to have a chance of becoming a professional player." She paused, and drew a deep breath. "I . . . I figured you could help me." Suddenly she bowed deeply. "Please assist me, esteemed sensei. I'm begging you."

Shirakawa placed one warm hand on her shoulder and forced her to straighten up. "Akari-chan, of course I will help you."

"Really? I don't know if I can thank you enough. What do you suggest?" she asked, eagerly.

"Hmmm . . . why don't you take a seat while I think about this?"

She pulled up a chair at the table across from him. From her pocket, she brought forth a mini-notebook and pen.

"You were prepared, weren't you?" he asked with a laugh. She blushed and made to put them away when he stopped her. "No, don't put them away. I was just teasing you. It's a good thing that you are so open to advice."

Smiling, she readied her pen.

"When you first came to my class three years ago with Shindou-kun, I was pleased to see young people being so interested in Go. Shindou-kun obviously had something. Something amazingly special and I felt honored to be his first teacher. But you were also special, too."

"I don't think so, sensei," she said with a small shake of her head.

"Oh, you aren't a prodigy like he is, but you still have improved dramatically since I first met you. Did you know anything about Go when you came that first day?"

"No. I'd never held a stone until then."

"And now you are one of the better players in my class."

She preened under his praise for a moment, then quickly sobered. "But I'm still not strong enough."

"No you aren't, and to improve you are going to have to work and make several sacrifices."

"I know. I am prepared." She had been waiting for this. She knew that by making this choice she was not only going to have to sacrifice all of her free time. But she would be forced to spend less time on school. Also, though the thought pained her, she knew that by making this choice, she would have to give up the Go Club. She deliberately refused to think about Mitani and his reaction to Hikaru's decision. She knew she wasn't prepared to think about it just yet.

"Good. First you need a one on one teacher."

"Two of my friends mentioned this. But how do I get one?"

"Good question, I notice you didn't ask me . . ." he trailed off, inviting her to fill in her explanation.

She flushed and dropped her gaze. "I didn't think you had the time and I didn't want to presume you would be willing teach me."

Shirakawa studied her briefly before responding. "You're right, I don't have the time. I am competing in the Meijin League as well as the preliminaries for the Honinbo league. On top of teaching this class and continuing my own studies. But, if I did have the time, I would be happy to have you as my student."

"So you aren't upset I didn't ask?"

"No, I'm not," he agreed. He then motioned to her notepad, and she readied herself for taking more notes. "There are three ways you can get a teacher. The first is having another professional recommend you to someone. I can check with my sensei and see if he would take you on as a student, but I don't think you want to join my group."

"Why not?"

"Because Shindou-kun is studying under Morishita-sensei as well."

She blanched and shook her head. "You're right. I don't think it would be a good idea. Hikaru would probably think I was chasing after him, and . . .."

"You don't need to say it, Akari-chan. Hikaru takes you for granted and he doesn't necessarily think before he speaks."

She nodded. She was relieved that she didn't have to explain that while she still cared about Hikaru, his callous remarks hurt her more than she should let them.

"So that eliminates the first option. Second, you can go to the Go Institute and ask and see who is taking tutors. But . . . you are not guaranteed of getting a good teacher that way. In fact, I wouldn't recommend it for you at all."

"Because I am a girl."

"Correct."

Suppressing a grimace, Akari acknowledged his words. Male chauvinism was alive and well in Japan. Most older men would refuse to teach her on principle, viewing the game as a man's domain. Even though women had been playing Go since the Heian era.

"So what would you recommend?" she asked, in a subdued voice.

"Well, several Go clubs and companies put on seminars and conventions. One thing you can sign up to do is play tutoring go with the visiting professionals. I would do that, since not only do you get to meet them but you get to see their playing style."

"That makes sense. I'll have to check them out."

"Do that. At the same time, I would suggest playing against stronger players than you have been."

"I know I need to do that. But I am not really comfortable going to go salons. And while I play in my school's club, only four or five of the players are strong enough that I need a handicap to beat them."

"What is your ranking in the club?" he asked curiously.

"Well I am currently ranked third out of five among the girls," she said with a small blush. "One of them only started playing this year and the other was like me and started playing in junior high."

"And the other two?"

"I haven't played them yet," she answered quietly.

"Ah. I see. Congratulations Akari-chan. But you understand why you need to play against stronger players, don't you?"

"Yes, I do. It's the only way for me to get stronger. But other than in salons and at school, I don't know where to find these stronger players."

"Hmm . . . have you tried online? I know that a lot of the insei are playing online, as well as some of the younger pros. I've even heard of higher ranked pros playing on some of the Go servers. I don't play online myself, but one of the members of my study group swears by it."

She nodded. "I don't have a computer at home, but one of my friend's older sister works at an internet café."

"Good. So that is an option for you."

"Um-hmm. Are there any other ways to play against stronger players?"

"Well, you can always go to the Go Institute and play in the salon there. Most of the players there are amateurs hoping to run into a pro or two, but many of them are still pretty good. And who knows, you may run into an insei or even a pro there."

"What about becoming an insei, I know I'm not strong enough now. But how do you become one?"

"Are you thinking about becoming an insei first?"

"I think it would be a good idea. I would like to meet other players my age. Besides I saw how much being an insei meant to Hikaru, I'd like to have that same experience."

"You are setting a difficult goal for yourself, Akari-chan. You are not even close to the strength of the weakest insei."

"I know, but if I work hard, maybe it could be possible." She gave him an earnest look full of determination. "I have to try."

"And I'll help you as much as I can," he soothed. "To become an insei, you need three _kifu_ from games you have played."

"Ah! I remember that! Hikaru needed those, so he played a three-way game against Kaga-sempai, Tsutsui-san, and Mitani-kun. When he was done, Tsutsui-san recorded their games. So I need three of them?" At Shirakawa's nod, she started musing out loud. "I have a lot from the go club, since I try to record all of the games I play. Maybe one of those. . . "

"You're going to want ones that show your strength," he said, interrupting her thoughts. "So I wouldn't use any of those. But keeping track of your games is a good idea. It will give you an idea of how much you improve over time. Once you get a teacher, they can evaluate where some of your major weaknesses are from them. After you get your _kifu_, you need sponsorship from a professional player."

Akari looked dejected. "How will I get that?"

"Well, since I can't tutor you full-time, I would be happy to sponsor you. When you, and whatever teacher you find, deem you're ready."

"Really! I don't know how I can thank you! I'm honored."

"It's the least I can do."

"You've done so much already!"

"And I was happy to help. I am pleased some of my students want to become professionals. It makes me think that maybe I am doing something right by being a teacher."

"You are a wonderful teacher! I've learned so much from you."

"It makes me glad to hear that."

Akari glanced at the clock on the wall behind his head. "I'd better take my seat, the rest of the class will be arriving soon. I know that Ueda-san was watching a match when I came in."

"I think that she comes here early so she can do that. From what I gather, she only gets the broadcast networks at home. She was absolutely devastated when Touya Meijin retired. She was a big fan of his. But I think that she has transferred her affections to Ogata Jyuudan, one of the Meijin's students."

"I think he was one of the people I saw playing today."

Just then the door to the classroom opened. A couple of middle-aged housewives started spilling into the room, commenting on the game that she had seen on her way in.

"Did you see that move he made?"

"Ogata-sama is so bold!"

"And young, don't forget young!"

"How could I? If I were only a few years younger . . . "

"But you're not!"

"Don't depress me."

Akari smiled at the middle-aged women's banter. They sounded so much like the girls in her class at school, that if she hadn't known their ages, she would have thought that they were a bunch of love-struck teenagers.

"I think I'd better take my seat, Shirakawa-sensei."

The young pro laughed. "This isn't high school with assigned desks. Sit where you want."

She flushed, even after attending class for over two years; she hadn't felt comfortable enough to move closer to the front. So she had been sitting in the very back of the room.

"Thank you," she said softly, putting away her pen and paper.

She pulled up one of the _goban_ and readied herself for class, determined to get the most out of it.

* * *

The next day, she slept in, relishing the opportunity to get a full night's sleep. When she woke up, she stretched languidly and glanced at the alarm clock by her bed. It was already past ten o'clock. Sundays didn't come often enough for her tastes. 

Flipping off the covers, she got out of bed and started performing a series of stretches. When she was done, she padded down the hall to the bathroom to finish the rest of her morning ritual including brushing her teeth and hair.

As she was finishing up, she heard a knock on the door. Looking up from the sink, she spat out the foamy toothpaste.

"What?"

"Hurry it up in there! Some of us have to use the toilet."

"Hang on! I'm almost done."

"If I pee out here, you get to clean it up!"

Akari ran the tap and rinsed her mouth out. "Ew! Gross! I did not need that visual!" She replaced her toothbrush and opened the door to see her older sister, Natsumi.

"About time! Another five seconds and you would have had huge mess to clean up."

"I don't know why you're so impatient. There's a toilet downstairs."

"That one's for guests, you know that. Besides, that tune it plays when it flushes is creepy."

"You're weird."

"And you're blocking the door. Move!"

Akari stepped back into the hallway, and Natsumi slammed the door.

"Mou! You didn't have to be rude!" she cried, sticking out her tongue.

She stomped back to her room, and flung open her closet. She yanked down a long-sleeved shirt and blue jumper and tossed them on the unmade bed. Still annoyed at her sister, she pulled out her underwear drawer and lifted out the first bra and panties she found without checking to make sure that they matched, like she normally did. She got dressed quickly, determined to make it downstairs before her sister was finished getting ready.

As she neared the stairwell, the aroma of miso soup floated up to her and her stomach growled. She grimaced ruefully. She was not one of those people who could skip breakfast and make it all the way to lunchtime on just a cup of coffee.

She reached the bottom of the stairs and walked into the kitchen.

"Morning, Mom! Breakfast smells wonderful."

Her mother paused in her stirring the pot of soup and turned to face her daughter. "Good morning, Akari-chan. How is my baby this morning?"

"'Mo-om! I wish you would stop calling me your baby! I'm almost 16!"

Fujisaki Naoko clutched her hands to her breast dramatically. "But you'll always be my baby girl in my heart. When you have children of your own, you'll understand."

"You're being silly."

"It happens to all of us as we get older. I think it is a sign of my approaching senility."

"You're not old, Mom, just silly."

"Thank you very much."

She looked around the kitchen. "So what can I do to help?"

Naoko lowered the heat on the stove so that the soup wouldn't boil and started dropping squares of tofu into the pot. "Well, you can finish setting the table and pull the _umeboshi_ out of the fridge. If you want, we can also have an omelet."

"Hmmm . . . I think traditional is what I am in the mood for this morning. So we have any other pickles?"

"I think the rice bran daikon are ready and there is one more jar of salt pickled carrots."

"I'll slice the daikon and put out the carrots then."

"That sounds good, baby."

Akari puttered around the kitchen setting out the finishing touches for breakfast. She was checking the rice cooker to see if it was done, when Natsumi joined them.

"Where's Daddy?"

"He took Prince for a walk this morning saying that he needed a break from all of the women in the house," Naoko replied, adding sliced green onion and dried seaweed to the soup. "If you want to make the tea, honey, we should be ready to eat in a few minutes."

"What about Papa?" Akari asked.

"He can have cold soup."

From the hallway, a man's voice could be heard. "You hear that, Prince? They're plotting against us in there."

Akari glanced over to the doorway and saw her father dressed in a jogging suit grinning at his family.

"Morning, Daddy!"

"Morning, Papa!"

"Welcome back, Darling."

Fujisaki Shinobu flushed and rubbed the back of his head. "Um, I'm home."

"Mou, you would think that you would have better manners, Darling. Your parents are the politest and most traditional people I have ever met. How did you become so rude?"

"It's all your fault, Dear. Your increasing beauty has taken my breath away. And with our two lovely daughters, well I was rendered speechless."

"Nice save, Daddy," Natsumi interjected dryly.

He flashed her a gamin grin. "I'm glad you liked it."

"Hmph! I don't think you've ever managed to grow up."

"Naoko-chan, how can you say that about your dear husband who loves you oh so much?"

"Easily."

"You're both so silly," Akari muttered.

"Who me?" both her parents said in unison, then laughed at the identical response.

Flipping off the stove, Naoko addressed her family. "Breakfast is ready if you want to sit down. Natsumi, honey, pour the tea. Can you serve the rice, baby?"

"Okay!" both girls replied, scurrying to do their appointed tasks.

Naoko ladled the soup into four bowls. Picking up two, she set them on the table. "How was your walk, Shinobu?" she asked.

"It was good. Here let me get that, you sit down," he replied snagging the remaining bowls from the counter before his wife had a chance to come get them. "I saw Aizawa attempting to jog around the block. He should have taken up exercise years ago, not after his doctor ordered him to."

The family sat down and as one said, "_Itadakemasu_!" Akari snagged a pickle and set it on her rice, while Natsumi lifted her bowl and started blowing on the hot soup.

"Um-hum. Anything else happen while you were out?"

"Well I saw Hikaru-kun on his way to the station. He waved, but we didn't talk."

Akari stiffened at Hikaru's name and set down her chopsticks. She hadn't seen him since graduation. She hoped he was doing well, but she hadn't quite gotten over the strangeness of not attending school with him anymore. They had first met in the local pre-school. Hikaru was being picked on by one of the playground bullies when Akari and Natsumi intervened. Natsumi chased the other boy away while Akari made sure Hikaru was alright.

The little boy had tried to shrug it off, but he was near tears. Silently, she had handed him a piece of lychee candy. He took it from her warily. But from that small incident, a long lasting friendship had been born. All through elementary school, the two had walked to and from school together and the trend continued in junior high. They weren't best friends by any means, but they knew each other and hung out together. Akari felt his absence greatly because it, more than anything else, signaled the sunset of her childhood.

For several moments, the rest of the family didn't notice her silence, eating and chatting amiably. Finally her mother looked up and noticed Akari's subdued demeanor.

"Are you feeling all right, baby? Does your stomach hurt?"

She shook her head. "I'm okay, Mom. When Papa mentioned Hikaru it hit me that he's pursuing his career and I'm still in school. I just realized how much things have changed."

"Oh, baby. You miss him."

"It's more than that," she said, stirring her soup with her chopsticks. "He's doing what wants to do. Racing towards his goal, and I still feel like I am at the starting line."

"Uh-oh, Akari's having a life crisis. Everyone brace yourselves."

"Natsumi!" Shinobu admonished.

"Sorry."

"You were saying, little princess?"

She sighed. She knew that she had to have this conversation about her future with her parents sometime. She just hadn't planned on it being so soon.

Before she had the chance to think of how to broach the subject, her mother asked, "Did you really want to go to Kaio High School, baby? Because it's still not too late to transfer."

"We've talked about this, Mom. The tuition is too high."

"Your father and I could work something out. We've discussed my going back to teaching at the university full-time and your father is in line for a promotion at his office."

Akari shook her head. "I don't think changing schools will help, in any case. I know what I want to do, it's just a matter of doing it and getting the training to be able to do it. Changing schools won't affect it either way."

"What do you want to do?"

"I want to be a professional Go player."

"A what?" her father asked in a confused voice.

"A Go Player, Darling, like Hikaru. Is this because of Hikaru, baby?"

"No, its because playing Go is something I love to do," she denied. "I love the competition. I love the discussion about techniques and moves. I love the infinite possibilities inherent in the game. I love that it is a tie to our past. I want to be a part of its future and I don't think I would be content with just sitting on the sidelines. I want to be a participant, even if it is only helping the stars shine. At least, I can say that I was a part of their journey. Even if I didn't shine so brightly myself."

Her parents stared at her; identical expressions of amazement were etched across their features. Akari averted her eyes, and went back to studying her soup. It had separated once more. She stirred it once before bringing it to her lips. She was pleased that it was still warm, although not as hot as she liked.

Her sister shook her head and reached forward to grab a slice of daikon. "Damn. I don't know what to say, sis. I've never seen you this passionate about anything."

"I love the game," Akari said with a shrug. "I'm just not very good at it."

"I can see where that would present a problem," her father joked.

"Darling! What would help?"

Akari blinked. She hadn't expected this response. Based on what Hikaru went through, she had assumed that her parents would oppose her decision. "Well, a lot of it I have to do on my own," she answered warily. At her mother's encouraging nod, she continued. "I need to find a teacher and stronger players first."

"Anything we can do to help?"

"You don't have a problem with me wanting to do this?"

"Princess, your mother and I decided a long time ago whatever you and Natsumi wanted to do with your lives, so long as it wasn't illegal or destructive, we would support you however we could." He paused, leaning back in his chair and closing his eyes. "My parents forced me to give up my dream, and I have always had that regret that I never tried to pursue it. I don't want you to have the same regrets I do."

"Papa . . . "

"I agree with your father, Akari," her mother interrupted. "My parents were the exact opposite of his. They supported my career, even though it was unusual to have a female want to be a college professor. Especially in mathematics. I knew I had a lot of obstacles to overcome, but they helped me as much as they could."

"'Mom . . . "

"So, what can we do to help?" her father repeated.

"I've talked to my sensei and one of my sempai and they both recommend getting a one on one tutor. They've also both suggested playing stronger opponents."

"That makes sense. So what do you need to do this?"

"I would like a computer so that I could play online against other players. I'm not comfortable going to Go salons, they are full of old men and cigarette smoke. I felt out of place. And while I could go to an internet café, it isn't as nice as being able to play at home. Eventually, I will need a go board and stones. But they don't have to be the expensive kind; a folding one would work fine. I just need something to play and lay out _kifu_ on."

Her mother nodded in understanding. "And getting a teacher?"

"I'm going to have to do that on my own."

"And after you find a teacher?"

"Well I am going to try to become an insei."

"What's an insei?" her father asked.

"It's a student of go," Akari replied. "They are trained specifically to be the next generation of pros. The Japanese Go Institute hosts the classes and the students are not quite amateurs but they aren't pros yet. It is one of the stepping stones to becoming a pro. Although you can only be an insei until the age of eighteen."

"And you are almost sixteen." Her sister pointed out, with her mouth full of rice.

"I know, I have to make up a lot of ground to even stand a chance of making it. But I am going to do it!"

"We understand," her mother soothed.

"Akari, have you thought about what you are going to do if you don't succeed?"

Glancing at her hands, she replied to her father. "I hadn't really thought about it. I suppose try to go to college, maybe become a teacher. I really don't know."

"How is this going to affect your school work?" Naoko asked and Akari winced. She had hoped that they wouldn't ask that question.

"It's probably going to drop my ranking a bit," she answered honestly. "I am going to have to focus on studying the game more and schoolwork less."

"Are you likely to fail any classes?"

She flinched again. "I hope not. But I honestly don't know. When Hikaru was an insei, he had to miss one afternoon a week and spend all of his Sunday at the Go Institute for class. He missed even more when he was taking the pro exam. Since the exam lasted for something like three months. Luckily some of it was over summer break, but still it really hurt his schoolwork."

"But you are a better student than Hikaru, sis," Natsumi said in encouragement.

"He's a better Go player though," Akari countered. "So I don't know how much that would make a difference."

"Hmmm . . . this is what I propose," Shinobu started. "For the next two years you do everything you can to become an insei and then a pro. But, if you aren't an insei by the time you turn eighteen, then I want you to enroll in cram school and focus all of your energy into getting accepted at a decent university."

"You mean you'll let me do this?" she breathed in amazement.

"We supported Natsumi here with her desire to become a fashion designer. That's why we sent her to that special high school and are now supporting her in her internship. It's not the career we would have chosen, but she's happy and she's doing a good job," her mother pointed out.

"It's true, Akari-chan. You weren't around when I had this conversation with them, but they made me a similar offer."

"To be honest, baby, I was wondering when this would happen and I hoped it would happen sooner rather than later. I didn't want to see you turn into one of those aimless people who wander from place to place, job to job, and are never really happy and just scraping by."

"I would have never considered Go as a career choice, though," Shinobu interjected. "It seems pretty far-fetched."

"I didn't think about it myself until I saw Hikaru do it. I love the game, I really do. Even if I don't make it, I won't stop playing," she vowed. "But I think I have a real chance."

"Well you have time, little princess. Just make sure to let us know what we can do to help."

Naoko picked up her rice bowl and poked at its contents with her chopsticks. "I think breakfast has well and truly gotten cold. Akari. Natsumi. Can you two clean up the kitchen? I want to talk with your father for a bit."

Natsumi nodded and Naoko and Shinobu rose from their chairs. Shinobu gave Akari a quick squeeze on the shoulder before following his wife out of the room. Akari breathed a sigh of relief. She was amazed about how well her family had taken the news as well as how supportive her parents were being.

Getting up from her chair, she glanced at her sister who flashed her a quick grin. Nodding in response, Akari started gathering up the dishes and taking them over to the counter to be loaded in the dishwasher. Natsumi poured the leftover soup into Prince's food bowl, and the large German Shepherd started slurping at the liquid.

"Are you sure this isn't about Hikaru?" Natsumi asked suddenly.

Akari sighed. If she had known that ever since she had made up her mind to attempt to make it playing Go that she would be asked that question at every turn, she would have investing in a large wooden placard reading 'No I am not chasing after Shindou Hikaru! Stop asking me that question!' She tried to imagine herself walking down the street wearing the sign and giggled at the visual. Then, she caught her sister's concerned expression and the smile slipped from her face.

"Sis, I didn't decide to become a pro to chase after Hikaru." Natsumi looked over at her skeptically. "Really. Hikaru showed me the game, but the desire and the love are mine. I could have quit when he did and instead concentrated on my studies or other clubs if I didn't love the game. I could have quit again when Tsutsui-san graduated. By then it was down to me, Kumiko-chan, and Natsume. If I had left the club then, Kumiko would have left with me and I don't know if Natsume would have been able to keep the club going. He's not as strong as Tsutsui-san."

Akari paused taking a deep breath, reliving the memories of that time. "It was hard getting the club back up to full strength, both Kaneko and Mitani joined the team reluctantly. But in the end, we did it. And we participated in tournaments. We were never as strong as the other schools who had full-time coaches, but we held our own. It took Kaneko-chan and Kaga-sempai to make me realize that despite how I got interested in the game, that it was something I wanted to do. It's not something for me to do to keep hold of Hikaru. But something I do for myself."

"But what about the crush you had?"

"I got over it. He grew up and so did I. I still care about him, I always will. He is my oldest friend. I can't change that Hikaru has been a huge influence on my life. But he isn't the driving force behind my decisions. Not anymore."

"Akari . . ."

"Let me finish, please. You were always the outgoing one, Natsumi. The tomboy. I was your shy little sister. For a long time, Hikaru and then Kumiko were my only real friends. But Go changed that. I can now talk to people and have faith in myself. It's made me into a better person."

"You really have given this a lot of thought," Natsumi said, placing the last pan into the dishwasher and closing the door.

"Not really, a lot of it I hadn't managed to put into words yet. I just knew that this felt right and that I was doing this for myself and no one else. But I hadn't really pinpointed why."

"You know that it isn't going to be easy?"

"I don't want it to be. It would cheapen it somehow."

"Well, I think we are done here," she said glancing around the kitchen. "Is there anything you want to do today?"

"I need to pick up a copy of Weekly Go and see if there are any seminars going on around here sometime soon."

"Why?"

"Remember how I said I needed to find a teacher. This is one place to start looking."

"Oh, I see. Well, good luck!"

"Thanks. I'm gonna need it. I have a feeling that finding a teacher is going to be very difficult."

Her sister gave her a strange look then changed the subject. "So, Akari, have you decided on what you want to do for your birthday?"

* * *

AN: 

Wow! I want to thank everyone who reviewed. It's really great getting this feedback. I am not big into thanking people individually – mostly because I feel that people get left out more than others. So instead I am going to address some of the things brought up in the reviews.

The chapters for this fic are likely to be very long, but that is because I have most of the story planned out to encompass certain themes and events and I don't think I can move on until they have been dealt with. Which can take up multiple scenes. As of right now, there are seventeen planned chapters and at least one planned side story from another character's POV – although there may be more but as of right now I am focusing on the main fic itself, which is told entirely from Akari's POV. So ultimately I know where this story is going and how it is going to end up. It should be interesting.

I've never thought of Akari as a weak character – underused – but not weak. In the anime she is shown standing up to Hikaru and she asks him to never come back to the Go Club because it hurts Mitani too much. That is something that had me goggling that she potentially sacrificed her friendship for the club. Yet later in the series, she comes the closest to pin-pointing what is wrong with Hikaru after Sai disappears. After playing Go a bit I began to realize just how hard the game is to learn and improve at. Her dedication to the game and the club is something to be admired. But she does have a long, LONG, way to go. And her way is not going to be as easy as Hikaru's because she doesn't have the ghost of the world's most famous go player as a teacher and because she isn't a prodigy. But she'll get some help and from some unexpected quarters, I don't want to give away too much though.

This fic, unlike most of my other stories, actually takes place in Japan – so I am trying to be true to the culture as much as I can. I can't do a few things – Like the fact that in Japanese it is VERY rude to say 'No' to anyone – but I am trying to impart that a bit. Little things like the kinds of pickles that the Japanese eat and the fact that they find musical toilets the epitome of class.

I have a few thank you's. First Troy Thomas for staying with me as a beta. I really appreciate that. I also want to say thanks to Mediaminer's FFRG as well as my friends who live/lived in Japan for some of the cultural aspects.

Thanks to my readers for staying with me. There should be one more groundwork chapter and then it should speed up considerably. Think of this as Fuseki – the opening moves. I hope this isn't moving too slowly.

Let's see the only other stuff is that I am working on the next part. While doing research for this fic I discovered that Go in Japan is like Golf or Nascar over here – it has it's own TV channels. I thought that was too neat not to include.


End file.
